Ultrasound #1

DUE DATE: JULY 27

I am 8 weeks and 6 days along.

This afternoon Brandon & I got to see the tiny baby for the first time! It wiggled around a lot and waved it's little arm buds. The nurse said it was in the "teddy graham" stage. It was really an amazing experience. It's weird that we are confident that I am pregnant, but it just really hasn't sank in yet. It seemed really weird to have this woman flashing my insides up on a screen and believe it was really MY insides --- MY (our) :) baby.

Brandon was pretty pumped. We did the cliche holding hands thing... but it was awesome to have him there with me. He said later that he kept looking at me and didn't see a smile on my face. I told him "IT HURT!" I was NOT expecting that. I thought a little pressure, maybe, but not this sharp pain. She was really pressing it hard on my stomach. Whatev. It was worth it.

The doctor did say that something came up on the ultrasound that it was worth mentioning. I am have what is called Complete Placenta Previa. The placenta has attached so that it completely covers my cervix. The doctor said that it isn't much to worry about now. We need to keep an eye on it. She said that the odds are that it will move as the baby gets bigger. We also opted out of having any of the genetic testing done. She said there is not really a down-side to not having it done, other than just our preparation. The only pro would be knowing if it has a higher risk of having Down's Syndrome or not. Since it doesn't matter either way, and since we don't want to oppose any unnecessary risks, we decided not to do it. So instead of at 12 weeks, our next ultrasound won't be until 19-24 weeks.

Something I am having trouble dealing with is....... wait for it..... I know you aren't expecting this, but ...... Brandon. :) A good friend reminded me that he doesn't sense any change. He isn't feeling any different. Well, newsflash: I AM. I feel mentally drained all the time. I feel physically drained most of the time. I do not want messes to clean up. I do not want to do laundry. I do not want to clean (the house or myself). I have no desire to wear nice (and thus, uncomfortable) clothes. Nothing ever sounds good to eat, yet I'm constantly hungry. Ugh. I regularly blow up on him. Then, it stresses him out. Or, I'll know that I'm just having a moment and will walk into another room or remain quiet because if I say something, I know it will be unkind. But if I do that, then he gets aggravated, too. It's a nasty thing.

Today at the appointment, I was sitting (uncomfortably, might I add) on the table. He was sitting (comfortably, I assume) in a nice, plush chair tapping his toes and making some sort of noise. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! And the worst part: I couldn't yell at him because the walls are paper thin. I was gritting teeth and hissing, "You had better knock it off or you'll be uninvited and have to wait in the waiting room." He laughed. He LAUGHED. Geez. I could have just punched him in the throat. Just thinking about how annoying it was is making me tear up in anger right now. I'm an emotional person anyway, but this. is. extreme.

My new motto: Whatev. It's all gonna be worth it.

Picture from: http://iamunimaginative.xanga.com/565619457/teddy-graham-eatery/